Adulthood doesn't necessarily mean he doesn't rely on his parents for basic supplies when he's home. If he's out of something, he usually comes upstairs and takes ours. I don't begrudge him toilet paper - as long as it's not the last roll in the house.
But the week he got here, he stole my conditioner.
I have baby-fine hair that tangles easily, and I rely on my conditioner. I'm not particular about what shampoo I use, but I like my shampoo and conditioner to match - that is, I like them both to smell the same.
So I buy shampoo and a matching conditioner. My current combo is a house brand from my local "natural" pharmacy, and its label says it's scented with "Ylang Ylang and Ginger."
Whatever. It has a kind of pleasant medicinal/menthol/herby smell to me.
The first morning I noticed my conditioner was gone. I knew who the culprit was.
For some reason, I use shampoo at a greater rate than I use conditioner, so when I'm out of shampoo, I still have a little conditioner in the bottle. So even though I was annoyed, I was able to use the remaining conditioner from the previous pair. It was lemon-scented.
Another thing I'm sharing with my son during his visit home is the Volkwagen. I usually drive it, but while he's home he drives me to work each morning so he can keep the car during the day.
I always forget to ask him to return my conditioner until we're in the car. The conversation usually goes like this:
Me: "Hey, can you please return my conditioner?"
Him: [Sigh] "Sorry, I forgot. Sure. I'll do it when I get back home."
Me: "Why don't you stop at Vons on the way home and get yourself some, that way you won't need mine."
Him: [Sigh] "Okay."
But each morning, I end up smelling like Ylang Ylang, ginger, and lemons.
Yesterday, I squeezed the tube of lemon-scented conditioner, and nothing came out but air. I spent the day frizzy. Although, I smelled more coordinated.
"I think he got some," said [The Man I Love]. "He got back before I left for work, and I saw a bottle on the counter."
"Let me just pick up some, just in case," I said, "for the next time he runs out."
So I grabbed the nearest bottle of the cheap stuff - Suave conditioner. Coconut scent.
When we arrived home, there was no bottle of conditioner on the counter. I figured Son had properly distributed both hair-care products to the rightful bathrooms. I left the Suave on the counter.
This morning, in the shower, I wet my hair and looked down for the shampoo - Hey!!! I still don't have any conditioner!!!!
So I got out of the shower, wrapped a towel around me and stormed dripping down to the kitchen to grab the coconut stuff.
Now I smell like mentholish Ylang Ylang and Ginger and Coconut. Kind of like an oily lounge chair at a beach resort in Australia.
After I finished and dried my hair I went down to the basement with the bottle of Suave. "Hey!" I knocked on his door. "Where's my conditioner?"
"Oh, Sorry. I'll get it." He went into his bathroom.
"I bought you this last night!" I said, brandishing the Suave. "Take. it."
"Actually, I bought some conditioner yesterday morning. I'm sorry I forgot to bring yours back upstairs." He handed me my conditioner and took the Suave.
Hey wait a minute! It felt suspiciously light. It's almost empty!
Gimme back the coconut stuff!
These are limones cocadas, Mexican candied limes stuffed with sweet coconut. Maybe I should buy lime-scented shampoo next time.
Kind of like an oily lounge chair at a beach resort in Australia.
ReplyDeleteroflmbo!
I spent my childhood nicking my mum's and sister's shampoo. Now I nick my wife's. It is the way it should be.
ReplyDeleteKIDS!!!!!
ReplyDeleteAt least he uses the stuff. My kids will be out of shampoo and/or conditioner and not tell me. And then I smell someone's head. UGH!!
ReplyDeleteI buy 2 shampoos and 1 conditioner at a time for myself -- it usually works out well that way. And yes, I buy the cheap stuff for my kids. If I smell green apple, I know they used it!
PS: I'm hungry now for coconut-lime treats.
ReplyDeleteGive up! You're a mom. Give up. Don't you remember the rules. We always lose...but with a smile. (Well, sometimes with the smile.)
ReplyDeleteGrown kids....sigh.
ReplyDeletearghghghg.
ReplyDeletewhen my kids were little, they would pick things up and accidentally drop them in a waste basket, one example. so the solution was to move things farther back on the counters, keep things out of reach, stop leaving things on the coffee table, etc.
now that they are tweens? they "borrow" things. might as well have dropped them in the waste basket, though, because when I need the item, it's nowhere to be found. I can't keep a pair of nail clippers handy to save my life.
It really does seem different when you don't get to use the kinds you mind is already set to using :-)
ReplyDeleteQuite a funny post but I'm sure it wasn't funny at all at that time.
Li
Oh! the joys of grown-up children!!
ReplyDeleteYou'll be sorry when he's gone and your conditioner lasts for simply ages!! ;)
No, no, that's not how that song goes. It's lime in the coconut, not the other way around!
ReplyDeleteAll of a sudden I've got The Chiffons' singing in my head: "He's so fine, Do ylang, do ylang, do ylang!"
ReplyDelete