Monday, December 10, 2012

Crimes against fashion

Ladies, I know at the age of 58, I am probably not the most fashionable, beautiful, or elegant person in the world.

I am happily married to a wonderful man who, at his age, is similarly flawed.

I have had to accept, in him, a widening ass, a protruding tummy, greying hair and the embarrassing disappearance of hair on the top of his head.

He has had to accept, in me, a widening ass, a protruding tummy, greying hair, and the embarrassing emergence of hair on my upper lip.

We have also had to accept one another's choice to prefer comfort over sexiness in our apparel. We may have been too eager to embrace frumpiness in our search for ease.

Click to "embiggen" if you can bear it.

But as for me, I have to draw the line at some choices. We were standing in line for a sandwich at Philippe's in downtown Los Angeles, and the gentleman in front of us was wearing these shoes. He was with his wife, and while I appreciate how true love could see beyond the sagging pants, the love handles at his waist, the untrimmed hair on the back of his neck, I do not understand how she could have allowed him to leave the house wearing these things.

If [The Man I Love] ever chooses to wear shoes like these, I am filing for divorce.

7 comments:

ifthethunderdontgetya™³²®© said...

AWESOME!

Where can I get some?

;-)

Sue (Someones Mom) said...

Well, as a woman of 58 married to a 58...I had to laugh at this one. I actually do still love to stay trendy (for my age) but I have had to give up when it comes to shoes. For the most part...comfort is the key...I have too many foot issues to mess with anything else. I'm in athletic shoes way more than I want to be and Privos by Clark are my "go to" shoe these days. Heels are not possible and my cute boots are only for short duration. I've seen those stupid foot shoes and I can't imagine wearing them and my husband would NEVER!!!

smalltownme said...

My sons both have these shoes and like them very much. My Zumba instructor and my beloved niece also wear them.

Will you still be my friend if I confess I bought a pair in basic black? I have not worn them much because my toes are proportionately too short (as I recently blogged about), but they are still pretty comfy.

If you stick with a less gaudy color combination they really don't look so ...er, well, noticeable!

Big Bad Bald Bastard said...

Those shoes are very handy when it comes to picking up dropped silverware.

small mind said...

I am with you Glennis .. however there is a resident on my street who wears them and is single and in the 60+ category and is looking for love ... I have often wondered whether to tell him NO - back away from the feet thingies ... but (a) I may give the impression I care and (b) others have told me they are comfy ... Who thought of them is my question ... ! x
P

Aunt Snow said...

Heidi, I will always be your friend, your footwear choices notwithstanding! (at least you chose a tasteful color!)

;-)

Karen (formerly kcinnova) said...

My son has a pair of black toe shoes (his are Vibram FiveFingers) but he much prefers to be barefoot. That, plus his often unkempt appearance (hair, beard and possibly clothing, I'm best off not knowing these things) that will probably keep him single and unemployed.
All that said (written), for Christmas we are getting him a pair of Huarache sandals and after watching the videos online(http://www.invisibleshoe.com/), my husband and I both want some, too.
I suppose if one is married and chooses to be weird, it is best done as a couple.