Thursday, April 30, 2009

Dear friend


I just heard the news of your loss, and it has filled my heart with sadness. I know how much you loved your son, I heard your love for him swell in your voice every time you mentioned his name - which you did so many times as we shared our stories of being mothers of sons.

I didn't know him well - he just came through the family room sometimes when you entertained "us girls" - the women who worked for you - at your home for parties - holidays, summer barbecues. You always served a special cocktail, so when he encountered us he was always a little bemused at our flush-faced giggling and games - silly old ladies, slightly drunk on cosmos! But he was always unfailingly polite and humorous. He was a graceful and well-mannered guy - he carried things, he moved tables, he helped out and then he always fled the intensity of our pre-menopausal female vibe!

His presence in your home was a reminder for me that boys grow up to be young men. If I happened to get a peek into his room through the open door off the hallway, seeing it just as messy as my own 16-year-old's room, well, it just showed me that sons - no matter how mature - never lose that part of them that will always be a little boy.

I cannot imagine what you are feeling right now. When I learned he was gone, they said he died in his sleep. I know that must have been merciful for him, but how cruel it must be for you. He was your only one, your boy; the two of you had shared so much together. I wish there was something I could say or do to help you carry the pain.

I just learned
this afternoon that my former boss, a woman of great talent, kindness, and leadership, lost her 26 year old son. He died unexpectedly in his sleep Monday night.

9 comments:

Kate said...

This is so sad; I'm sorry. These things never make any sense. I wish her peace in the midst of great pain and loss.

mo.stoneskin said...

My goodness. Don't know what to say. Sending thoughts and condolences.

Gilly said...

I am so sorry. You are both in my prayers.

KBeau said...

I can't begin to imagine the heartbreak of losing a child. So sad.

Beverly said...

My heart is breaking for this loss. A mother's heart never recovers.

Woman in a Window said...

...in his sleep...unbelievable. Can't imagine the pain. Don't want to.

MyThoughtsMyVoice said...

While sleeping? Possibly acute hemorrhagic pancreatitis.

A heartbreaking story, this is. I could not imagine the sadness it must have brought to a mother. I hope his family will cope well. :-(

kcinnova said...

I'm so sorry.
Your tribute to him is beautiful.

I am a Tornado ~ proven fact! said...

So very sad.

My heart aches for his mother.

I shall say a prayer for him and wishes of peace for his family and friends.